Thursday, May 14, 2009

Don't Wear Aluminum Foil Helments!



It has long been suspected that the government has been using satellites to read and control the minds of certain citizens. The use of aluminum helmets has been a common guerrilla tactic against the government's invasive tactics [1]. Surprisingly, these helmets can in fact help the government spy on citizens by amplifying certain key frequency ranges reserved for government use. In addition, none of the three helmets we analyzed provided significant attenuation to most frequency bands.

The helmets amplify frequency bands that coincide with those allocated to the US government between 1.2 Ghz and 1.4 Ghz. According to the FCC, These bands are supposedly reserved for ''radio location'' (ie, GPS), and other communications with satellites (see, for example, [3]). The 2.6 Ghz band coincides with mobile phone technology. Though not affiliated by government, these bands are at the hands of multinational corporations.

It requires no stretch of the imagination to conclude that the current helmet craze is likely to have been propagated by the Government, possibly with the involvement of the FCC. We hope this report will encourage the paranoid community to develop improved helmet designs to avoid falling prey to these shortcomings.

3 comments:

billy pilgrim said...

i'm wearing a welder's mask right now to stop the google mind reading rays coming out of my screen.

texlahoma said...

Good thinking Billy, if that is indeed who you really are.

You could just be a computer program somewhere used to extract vital information from those of us that are "awake"!

texlahoma said...

Sorry Billy, I almost got a little paranoid there.
A welders mask sounds like a pretty good idea.
I'm wearing ear plugs just in case there are audio subliminal messages like "Accept the new world order."